Reuven Koret is publisher of israelinsider and CEO of Koret Communications.
More from Reuven Koret
	Dealing with the devil
	A plea for forgiveness
	A caution before the crusade
	Time to face Mecca
	What the world can learn from Israel
	Israel should be grateful for Durban
	Do good fences really make good neighbors?
	Sexual fantasies of a suicide bomber
	Re-Orienting Israeli policy
	"Swordfish" and Israeli anti-terrorist policy
	Before the boom
	Old enough for a new gas mask
	Israeli airspace: Who's flying, who's not
	Before the storm
	Avoiding future catastrophes
	Facing the faceless enemy
	A tale of two doormats
	Replacing Humpty Dumpty

Israel should consider a similar marketing strategy to improve its flagging tourism industry, its economic conditions, and its political position.

Let's start with the West Bank. By dropping the "West," Israel could achieve a number of immediate benefits. (The "West Bank" in any case was the result of a "Bank robbery": Jordan invaded and annexed the area during its unsuccessful attempt to wipe out the newborn Israeli state in 1948. It needed to distinguish the West Bank of the Jordan from the East Bank it already ruled.)

Were Israel to rename the area simply "The Bank," an historical injustice would be erased and the territories would be able to shed their "Wild West" shoot-'em-up image. With a new moniker, the territories could become a magnet for a sure-fire investment: expressions such as "like money in the Bank" and "you can Bank on it" would no doubt help attract foreign investors and raise the credit rating of the local economy.

The same principle could be applied to the Golan Heights. Drop the "Golan" and you're left with "The Heights" - which sounds rather like an expensive high-rise development, or maybe even a TV show. More on that later…

And just think what could be done with the Gaza Strip. Drop the "Gaza," and promote the area as a Mecca of adult entertainment. "Let's go to the Strip" could become the slogan that will attract hordes of Israelis and tourists to discos and other "Strip Clubs."

The Islamic fundamentalists might object, but there would be something in it for them, too. The Strip has what it takes to host a bustling theatre district. We regularly see Gaza political rallies in which hooded and colorfully-costumed performers burn flags and hang Jews in effigy, with the kids dressing up in dynamite belts and blowing up cardboard Israeli buses. So there may be real theatrical potential there, though I may be mistaken. On second thought, a Hamas-sponsored play would probably bomb on the first night.

But perhaps the greatest potential benefit would be a minor modification to the name of Israel itself. Difficult to pronounce as it is, we should just swap the positions of the "a" and the "e" and rename the country "Isreal," or maybe just "Real" for short. Thus we could market our nation as antidote for escapism and virtual lifestyles. Tourists would be encouraged to come here not to get away from it all, but to get into it all. "This is Real" or just "Get Real" would return our nation to its rightful and historic place as the center of world Truth. The fundamentalists would flock here.

But maybe that would narrow our potential audience too much. Perhaps we should go in the other direction and market Israel as the ultimate escapist adventure. Capitalizing on the success of made-for-the-tube confections like "Survivor," we could promote our nation as the ultimate in real-life simulation, a national-scale survival game show accessible to the hundreds of millions by television and the Internet.

We wouldn't have the same problem as North Dakota. As one South Dakota legislator griped (perhaps with some jealousy that he didn't come up with the idea himself): "Well, you can put a pig in a dress, but it wouldn't change the fact that it's a pig." He went on to complain that "I can change my name to Arnold Schwarzenegger to make people think I'm big and muscular, but the first time people see me, they'll know it's not true."

That's not the problem here: the Jewish people may not have many pigs, but we have what's it takes. We may not be as big and muscular as Arnold, but so what? As some say (and Arnold knows) we control Hollywood! Reality-based television is the future, and this nation, my friends, is Real as it gets. Besides, to believe some of our politicians, territory is of no relevance in the missile age.

And that's why I've reserved a new web domain to be held in trust for the future home of the Jewish People: www.isreality.tv. Strip away the non-essential dressing, like land and people (both apparently quite expendable these days), and you have a robust virtual nation ready for launch either on the Internet, as a pay-per-view program, or maybe even as a full-blown cinematic blockbuster. And you can take that to the Bank.

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